I was a pretty young lady back in the day touring Germany by myself getting tired of all the attention I drew from single men. I was in a church when some guy approached me and said something to me in German. I said, “Do you speak English?” (although I was fluent in German). He looked at me hopefully and said yes! I said very loudly-FUCK OFF! I felt so much better.
Clearly Charlee and my Erin are soul baller mates !! Erin aka Mcnasty soccer forward took behemoths down. Now a grown 38 year old woman with 2 daughters under 3, a creative director who at intervals swears like a sailor. I forward your stories to her. Similar snarky, pitch perfect humor with a bite.ps glad you saved your house while your family fled. Great teamwork 👌😆
I hear you on this: "“Stop wiping your penis on the frickin’ credenza,”. For me it's "Nobody wants to see your penis", and "Stop licking the couch". But you know... dogs will be dogs. Anyway, I was ready at the start of this to jump in at what assholes kids can be (your own), until I realized this was about someone else's assholes. I can absolutely side with you on the sharpening of the ax and digging holes.
Back in the days of my wild west childhood the parental refrain for when a parent or authority figure approached them was "What did YOU DO!"... not even a question. Now, sadly, when you approach a parent about the assholery their child has committed wherein you have video, pics and 14 witnesses, the response is always a definitive, "Not MY kid!"
These are the kids that grow up to play violent scream filled videos on their phone at full blast on the 5am ferry; and , blast their music through a bluetooth speaker on the subway at harried commuters held prisoner in a metal tube, who just want to get home with all their inside parts still on the inside.
Norman you know you did it right when your daughter tells the boys to fuck off, punctuates it with a win and then asks them if that's the most wobble their tiny scrotums can muster. Bravo.
RE: dogs -- I used to wait table with a woman who had a HUGE Rottweiler named Moses. She taught it to roll over on its back and spread eagle when she said, "Show us your clackers."
You're right about that shift in parenting. My initial impulse is always to brandish a box cutter in defense of my kids, but there's that little voice that reminds me that anyone's kids have the capacity to be an asshole, even mine. Reminding myself--and them--of that fact goes a long way in terms of assholery triage.
A kid or anyone who listens to anything at full blast on a 5am ferry ought to be thrown overboard after the water has been chummed with week-old tuna.
And thanks for the compliment on my daughter. We're proud of her. I wish we could take credit, but she's been saucy from the jump. ;)
I’m going to consult with you, Becky and Charlee for all my conflict resolution needs when my kids hit the high school years. I truly hope they take up the offer to attend the next game and I want a front row seat. 🍿
2-3. I spent many years in "medieval rage", and I always checked to see if I was projecting, but when the rage was on behalf of my kids, I don't think I regretted any of my outbursts.
Damn right I told my 7th grade son that if “Voldemort” harassed you again.. and a fight looked likely.. get the first punch in.. right to the gut or to the nuts. Don’t do the face. Looks a lot worse, but less oomph. I’ll support you all the way.
Charlee is one badass human. She can squelch the life out of a wobbly scrotum without even flinching a muscle.
Squelch has never been used so perfectly in a sentence.
I was a pretty young lady back in the day touring Germany by myself getting tired of all the attention I drew from single men. I was in a church when some guy approached me and said something to me in German. I said, “Do you speak English?” (although I was fluent in German). He looked at me hopefully and said yes! I said very loudly-FUCK OFF! I felt so much better.
Love that you baited him. Bilingual banter for the win!
Clearly Charlee and my Erin are soul baller mates !! Erin aka Mcnasty soccer forward took behemoths down. Now a grown 38 year old woman with 2 daughters under 3, a creative director who at intervals swears like a sailor. I forward your stories to her. Similar snarky, pitch perfect humor with a bite.ps glad you saved your house while your family fled. Great teamwork 👌😆
Jennifer, you and me, we do good work. ;)
Your daughter is like Caitlin Clark and the Wobbly Scrotum Scrum was Angel Reese. She OWNED those boys.
And the award for simile of the year goes to... ;)
I hear you on this: "“Stop wiping your penis on the frickin’ credenza,”. For me it's "Nobody wants to see your penis", and "Stop licking the couch". But you know... dogs will be dogs. Anyway, I was ready at the start of this to jump in at what assholes kids can be (your own), until I realized this was about someone else's assholes. I can absolutely side with you on the sharpening of the ax and digging holes.
Back in the days of my wild west childhood the parental refrain for when a parent or authority figure approached them was "What did YOU DO!"... not even a question. Now, sadly, when you approach a parent about the assholery their child has committed wherein you have video, pics and 14 witnesses, the response is always a definitive, "Not MY kid!"
These are the kids that grow up to play violent scream filled videos on their phone at full blast on the 5am ferry; and , blast their music through a bluetooth speaker on the subway at harried commuters held prisoner in a metal tube, who just want to get home with all their inside parts still on the inside.
Norman you know you did it right when your daughter tells the boys to fuck off, punctuates it with a win and then asks them if that's the most wobble their tiny scrotums can muster. Bravo.
RE: dogs -- I used to wait table with a woman who had a HUGE Rottweiler named Moses. She taught it to roll over on its back and spread eagle when she said, "Show us your clackers."
You're right about that shift in parenting. My initial impulse is always to brandish a box cutter in defense of my kids, but there's that little voice that reminds me that anyone's kids have the capacity to be an asshole, even mine. Reminding myself--and them--of that fact goes a long way in terms of assholery triage.
A kid or anyone who listens to anything at full blast on a 5am ferry ought to be thrown overboard after the water has been chummed with week-old tuna.
And thanks for the compliment on my daughter. We're proud of her. I wish we could take credit, but she's been saucy from the jump. ;)
Brilliant. Ha. Charlee is my hero
Mine, too.
I’m going to consult with you, Becky and Charlee for all my conflict resolution needs when my kids hit the high school years. I truly hope they take up the offer to attend the next game and I want a front row seat. 🍿
Hopefully it plays out like Godfather Part II in terms of sequels and not like, ya know, Police Academy 2- 6+.
1. I've had too many instances to recount.
2-3. I spent many years in "medieval rage", and I always checked to see if I was projecting, but when the rage was on behalf of my kids, I don't think I regretted any of my outbursts.
4. Genius. Don't change it.
1. I'd expect nothing less.
2-3. Rage on behalf of a children is a justifiable offense.
4. I've always liked you.
Damn right I told my 7th grade son that if “Voldemort” harassed you again.. and a fight looked likely.. get the first punch in.. right to the gut or to the nuts. Don’t do the face. Looks a lot worse, but less oomph. I’ll support you all the way.
Ha. Voldemort is a catch-all term for bullies in our house too.